Wednesday, November 11, 2009

... And now, for your opening act...

Posted by Ashley [aka Keens] at 10:38 PM

First, I'd like to remind everyone that lying on your dating profile will not only get you caught (uh, we DO have to meet) but will make you look extremely stupid. Okay, now that it's been said let me introduce you to "the teacher".  From the first few conversations I gathered that he's into running, teaching, and making everyone laugh.

Since my profile states that I love sushi (OMG he can read?) he suggested that we meet at a sushi place downtown.  I'm automatically down and tell him that I can meet him after work.  Well, about 15 minutes prior to when we're supposed to meet, he texted me and told me that he was at the restaurant early but not to rush. I don't know about you, but this automatically makes me feel rushed (strike 1).  When I arrive I notice that something didn't add up.  I recalled on his profile that he said he's 6'2'' but when he stood up he's clearly 5'2''.  To this day, I'm not sure why he would lie to me about that (strike 2).  He also told me that he was the funniest guy I'd ever meet.

In case you've never met me, I laugh at EVERYTHING.  However, the teacher failed to make me laugh - not even once! To make matters worse, he rolled his eyes whenever he felt awkward - which was every time that I wouldn't laugh at his jokes.  He asked if I wanted to go somewhere else with him that night and I declined (wonder why?).  As we were leaving, the server tracked us down because apparently my date left HIS BOOK at the restaurant.  Okay, let's get a few thing straight...

1.  He lied about his height
2.  He was obnoxiously early
3.  He wasn't funny
4.  He brought a book to read in his "down time"

At this point I'm dying to leave ASAP.  So he walks me to the parking garage in the area and I give him the courtesy "goodbye hug" which he thinks means "let's make out in front of everyone in the area". I manage to dodge the kiss and tell him that I'm parked in the garage nearby.  He insists on walking me to my car (ugh!) and tries AGAIN to kiss me.  I dodge the kiss a last time and tell him to have a good night.  Now, I'm pretty certain that if a chick denies you twice she's not interested in you.  Call me crazy.

After that date, I figured he would have gotten the hint and he'd leave me alone.  I'm not so lucky.  A few days later he noticed me online (damn you, match.com) and messaged me.  Sometime a minute after I signed on.  Anyways, FYI - the block feature on match.com is amazing.  :)

 

1 Comment:

  1. a crowded mind said...
    November 12, 2009 at 2:23 PM  
    A few things to comment on.

    I think he brought a book to seem intelligent. There are a few things guys try to come off as when wanting to impress a girl. He knows bringing a book is a gamble, but at the same time maybe he thought you would like that. Did he ever asked if you liked to read or maybe that was on your profile.

    You shouldn't have let him walk you to your car if you weren't attracted. I don't know how many times I've told women this, but I guess I'll keep saying it until they get it through their heads. Men are simple minded creatures. We don't do hints, guesses, mind reading, or any other method considered beating around the bush. You must come out and tell us "no, I don't want a kiss, i'm sorry. Also, I can walk myself to my car, but thank you for offering". Its not rude to clearly state the date ends now and its over.
    Any chance given is taken as a chance for something further. "if she let me walk her to her car, maybe she'll give me a hug, if she hugs me maybe a kiss, if a kiss maybe..." You get the drift.
    Just like responding to messages in an online dating scene. If you respond AT ALL, you provide hope. Men are creatures of opportunity, hope is opportunity. If you create one, the other will follow and you'll see a guy right in the middle.

Post a Comment



Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)