Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Sharing is caring?

Posted by Ashley [aka Keens] at 12:44 AM

Like most people, I was apprehensive to join the online dating trend. I felt like I was attractive enough to not need to resort to that venue. When I was in college it was super easy to meet people, so I figured I should have no problem meeting people out in the "real world". However, having a career really only limited my social settings to bars where quality people were lacking. My best friend at the time had joined match.com a year earlier and continuously begged me to join. I finally gave in after several doomed attempts using the "old fashioned" way.

Since we were be st friends on the same site, we frequently shared screen names of the dudes we were planning to date. This insured we would not talk to the same guys and we wouldn't talk to guys that turned out to be losers (according to each other).

Well, apparently I forgot to ask her about a date I had scheduled a few days away. I mentioned his screen name in passing and she froze and bluntly said I can't go out with him. According to his profile, he was great on paper and his pictures didn't hurt my eyes so I was a bit surprised. I asked why not and apparently he had shown up with us downtown one night. I had been a little tipsy when he met her and I whispered to her that he was ugly and that she could do better.

I'm pretty picky when it comes to my dates and I don't like to waste my time. If I said he wasn't attractive after a few drinks it wasn't worth my time, just being honest. So I immediately called him up and explained that since he had gone on a date with my best friend, the date with us was off.

He went bat sh*t crazy. At first he couldn't remember her. Then he said it was only one date. I pulled the "I can't date my friends' dates" card but he didn't want to hear that. After about 20 mins of arguing about it (I should have hung up, I know) and begging me to give him a chance, he hangs up on me. NOTE: He's never met me. Who argues like that with someone they've never met? Not five minutes pass and he sends my friend an email on match.com saying how dare she interfere with his business, etc. I blocked him and haven't heard from him since.

I'm no longer friends with her but I'll give her props for saving me a horrible night.

 

2 Comments:

  1. Anonymous said...
    October 29, 2009 at 10:32 PM  
    I have an even better story!!! Sit down ladies!!! I saw the love of my live...Husband to be on match.com when my friend was showing me the profiles of her matches!! She was asking for advice about certain guys and up popped mine!! Yes, you could have knocked me over with a feather. That was about a month ago and he is happily dating anything and everything on that site within a 50 mile radius of his home. Well some of you will say your better off finding out now but my poor heart is crushed. Men are nasty. I am going to remain single forever. Oh and the perfect ending to this is that he asked me no begged me to get divorced so that we could be together! I think that I am the loser here. Thoughts anyone?
    Anonymous said...
    October 30, 2009 at 2:24 PM  
    Anonymous,

    First I want to apologize for my gender. I am sorry you feel all men are nasty but I assure you, we're not all like the guy you described. I have many thoughts about this situation but right now they're based on a limited amount of info. So, if you don't mind I would like to ask some questions.
    1. husband to be, i assumed you guys wre engaged?
    2. were you living together or separate addresses?
    3. How often did you see one another if you weren't living together?
    4. You got a divorce to be with this guy?
    5. Was there an affair on your part to be with this guy and thats why he begged you to leave your husband?
    6. How long were you together before finding this out?
    7. How long did you know him?
    8. How did you meet?
    I know it seems like a lot of questions but based on the info you've provided i don't think anyone could give any credible feedback to your situation.
    I wouldn't call you a loser in this scenario. I feel there were big risks to what you did and you took them. Unforunately for you, you were taken in by a guy that already lack moral judgement by asking an already married woman to get divorced to be with him. So I will just say 2 more comments before leaving it in your court. One, if you were so easy to leave your husband and be with this guy, what gives him the assurance you wouldnt'do that again? Two, a giant red flag didnt pop up that this guy may lack good judgment because you were already married and he had no respect for that? Which means marriage meant little to him and therefore it probably wouldn't have worked out with him.

    I leave it to you...

    Thanks for sharing,

    Anonymous #2

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